Saturday, 14 August 2010

Sniffs McKenzie and the theory of definites.

"I've seen the future y'know," said Sniffs, pulling back slightly as the rank smell of the green fucker, now kneeling in front of him, grew thicker as its fear grew stronger.
"Aye, funny that isn't it? Funny thit you're here in front of me, instead ay skulking aroond wi yer stinkin' mates. Sneaking aroond, killing and daein' whit ye want, 'hinking we're aw too fuckin' scared ay the dark tae stoap ye. Funny thit am the man wi the gun pointed at your fuckin' heid though eh? Or at least your fucking excuse fur a heid."
He shook his own head, still unsure of how this scenario came to be, only sure that it was here and it was now and that there was no one else to do this. No one at all. As fucking usual.
"Ye wid 'uv been better readin' "Trainspottin'" or watchin' "A fucking sense ay freedom" or researching some other piece o' decent contemporary Scottish information, before comin' doon here naw? Comin' here tae bonnie auld Scotland eh?" Sniffs smiled with his lips only. "It might huv gein ye a better idea ay whit we could be like. What did ye expect likes? Feart wee bairns aw shitein' thumsleves cause eh the big bad fuckin' aliens? Ah dinae fuckin' think so."
The green fucker just stayed rock still, facing away from Sniffs. It would have been staring at the floor, if it had eyes.
Sniffs pulled the cocking lever back on the rifle, as the soldier called Whitman had shown him, checked that the safety was off, and aimed it at the ridge on the back of the green fuckers skull.
"Aye. Ah've seen the future yah fuckin' murderin', butcherin', stinkin' piece ay shit. And there is one thing that is definite. In the future we are aw deid."
Sniffs pulled the trigger.

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